I love all you guys!!!! Thank you so much!!!!
I am having a lonely and hard time now. Luckily, Toshi is really helping and care me on the other side of the sea, I am really thank for everything he have done for me. Also, I wanna thank Masa and Can. Masa help me a lot and make me feel better a lot too, and Can is always there for me too. She talks a lot on the phone with me and try to make me happy too.
I love all you guys!!!! Thank you so much!!!!
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Friend came here, and told me to think about what kind of person that I wanna be when I can't sleep during the night.
Why you care? You should dislike me by who am I. If I am not wrong, I am a bitch for you. Please don't care about me and forget me. Don't come into my life. Don't judge my friends and love by nations. This life is mine, right? Or, you can take it? Came home from work and saw Toshi was waiting for me outside of the house. After welcome me home from work, Toshi told me that he will go back to Japan on 19th. I know Toshi will go back soon, and I can't keep him with me forever. But, it still made me sad.
Only few days until Toshi leave. I asked breaks from my work for next week 'cause I wanna be with him more before he leave. Even he will come back after three or four months, but I am that kind of person who hates people leaving. Toshi did his best to stay in US as long as he could. I am happy about it and thank for him. Well, take care in Japan and we will see each other soon! Today was busy, I had 9 customers and didn't have anytime to relax for long. But, I did have a short period of time that nothing to do. I went to kitchen and ate some animal cookies. I don't know why, but while I was relaxing, I thought about my mom. There was one old time image came out of my mind which is I was eating something and my mom came out and told me don't eat snakes because we will have dinner soon. I felt so upset and depressed. I start to miss my parents. I am not that kind of girl who easy miss their parents, but I felt that the times that I miss my family is more than before. While I do nails for those ladies whose age are close to my mom or grandmother, I will miss them. While I think about all those Korean co-works who are nice to me and have children close to my age, I will miss my parents. I do miss them, I think. Haven't leave with them or spend any quality time with them in 6 years. I should shame on myself for whatever I did to make my parents sad or disappointed. After all, I am their only child and they love me deeply and truly. I love them too, but it just hard for me to tell them. I hope I can see them soon, and best wishes for them. ( The picture: I was only 15. I looked so stupid, but look at my family, we were all happy. I haven't see any of us have that kind of smile together for long time. I miss my happy family.)
Something happened which made me so mad yesterday. I went to do laundry yesterday's afternoon in Fairfield. As always, after I put my laundry in dryer, I went to wash my car. The car wash place just 2 mins away from laundry shop. I spend around 30 mins wash my car after that I went back to pick up my laundry. Around 4:30, I walked out from laundry shop and tried to open my car.
THEN!!! A white American guy walked to me and asked me if I saw a wallet at car wash place. I told him I didn't. He kept ask me and looked into my car like searching for something at the same time. I wanted make sure if he said is the car wash place, so I asked him where he was asking. I made sure that he was talking about the car wash place that I went to around a hour ago, and I told him that I am sure I didn't see any wallet. Then, he asked me if I was leaving or not, I told him I was. He started to using his cell phone save my plate number. I was confused by his action, and I ask him:" You think I stole your wallet?!!" He kept save my plate number and said:" Yes, I think you stole my girlfriend's wallet." I was SO surprised, and I said:" What? That's so stupid!!!" He walked away from me and my car. I looked at him and he got in a white car which I noticed was parking beside my car over car wash place. So, I went to there, and saw that girl who was washing that white car inside of that car. I walked to the driver side door and asked her:" You think I stole your wallet? " She said:" No." I said:" That's so stupid!!! Do you want search my car??!!! I haven't go home yet.!!" She said:" No, I don't wanna search your car." I was so mad at that I told her that I don't even know what her wallet looks like, and I went to close to her car once because I needed the cleanser for my car window, and I had to cross her car to get it. She was saying that she didn't think I stole her wallet. I just left them madly. That made me So MAD!!!!!! After while, I thought that I should stay there longer and ask them if they need call the police or not 'cause I would like to call police for them!!!! Stupid Couple!!!!! For couple of days, weather has been good. I always wanna go to seaside to give back something to the ocean. I have been lazy becuase of the nice weather. Today was a good day. Not hot or cold. A good spring day. After my morning class, I went home to sleep more. But, while I was on my bed, my mood dropped down very fast. Something was brothering me and making me depress. I thought about it for a while, and thought it was a good time to go to seaside.
Went to seaside by myself. Good day, good day. No so many people at seaside. It took me a long time to give back the things to the ocean. Once in my life, they were very important, but I know I had to give them up, no matter how much I like them. Fianlly, I did. Wasn't that hard. I stayed at seaside for a while, just relax, feel the ocean and wind. smoked a little bit. (smile) What I had to give, I already gave. What I have to take back, I will take back. Life is not fair. Peace! |