It is November already. This year's fall has been very soft. Sunshine is warm enough and only one layer of cloth can keep me warm. This winter should be softer than ever.
I got a email from Mr.Deer out of blue. The email made me feel he still need me, but maybe not as much love in it anymore, but just a feeling of holding on the past. Maybe himself doesn't even notice, or maybe my feeling is wrong. Wen people depressed, people want to grab on something to give them the emotional support, this time, Mr.Deer chose me. But, I can't be that one who can give him what he need, not don't want to, but I can't lose the happiness that I have now. It is kind of like Mr.Young. I dreamed about him couple days ago. Maybe I do want to see him, but I promised to do the right thing. I don't want to be in the mud hole again.
I don't know what I really want in life. I changed my mind too many times and was tired of the life I had the reason of it? I am really easy to get tired of things, huh. I hate the life once I am use to it. But I don't have a goal in life. And, I am lazy, easy to give up. Mr.Carrot blamed me about it yesterday. He is right. I can't change even I tried to many times.